Making People Feel Stupid

The key to effecting change in an organisation and protecting your own position as the instigator of change is to keep a position of power and mystique. If you cannot do this, then you may be seen through and people may find an easy way to remove you or poo-poo your techniques. For the most part, people are frightened to look stupid. This is especially true for techies. So, here are some tips for how to ensure that your new disciples never lose sight of you as the new messiah:

• Never smile - smiling tells people that you want to be liked
• Never fully explain yourself
• Always make a lot of references to other more-important sounding people
• When faced with a direct question on your ideas force the questioner to try to work out the answer themselves - having to think of an answer forces them to accept the premise they're questioning
• Keep your silence when under pressure - staying silent is powerful
• Occasionally slip in derogatory adjectives - e.g. "Whichever stupid person did this"
• Find a keen mug to be your principal disciple and, via a series of reward behaviours (like being actually nice to him or her, in private only), work them up to fever pitch as your missionary
• Write a blog detailing things you've read
• Be prepared to reel off the dogma at any/every opportunity
• Try to avoid committing yourself too much to any specific solution - just hold on to the principals and your view of the problems

Soon you too should be able to wreak your own brand of devastation on any company foolish enough to believe that it needs your help.